Expose191419
April 26th, 2006, 02:32 PM
I got this article forwarded via email and thought it was good. It applies to everything from the gym, to relationships, to career I think. The problem today is alot of people in this day and age dont know what being a real winner means. They think they should just be awarded for the effort instead of the results.
By John Atlantis
Hey guys,
Awhile back I saw a very interesting episode of 60 Minutes
regarding the inflow of the "self esteem generation" into the
workplace. These were all the kids who got a prize for showing up,
not for winning (wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings by
elevating a winner), who'd been praised, spoiled, and coddled by
well intentioned parents and teachers and friends, and who were getting a very
rude awakening in the real world--something they were completely
unprepared for.
One of the guys they interviewed said transitioning these "love me
because I showed up kids" was a real problem, because they expected
rewards without achievement, something they were used to all of
their lives.
Do these kids have any real self esteem? No, they do not. Self
esteem doesn't come from "just showed up ribbons" or constant
praise and reassurance, it comes from achievement and
accomplishment. It comes from taking action and overcoming odds.
It comes from winning, and loathing of losing. The people with the
highest self esteem are those who hate losing to the point that
they take action to never lose. It
drives them to achievement, and sends their self esteem into the
stratosphere.
Here's the truth: if you're going to be successful with women, you
have to have self esteem. Women are magnetically attracted to men
with high self esteem--not the phony, "I just showed up so love me"
crap.
Here's a big secret: if your self esteem is not where you want it
to be, you can quickly and easily skyrocket it to where women can
feel your sense of yourself. And, quite frankly there are a lot of
guys who've taken some hits, had some losses, and their self esteem
is shaken--they start questioning themselves, and their esteem
plummets. I've had (brief) episodes of it myself, and if you're
alive and human, it will happen to you to.
But, when it happens, all you have to do is start the rebuilding
process. Now, I don't mean doing something goofy like wandering
around muttering "I esteem myself." That doesn't do anything
except make you look stupid.
To rebuild your self esteem, here's what to do: set a goal, no
matter how small, and accomplish it. Don't make it an easy one
(like breathing or getting out of bed), make it one where you have
to challenge yourself a bit, where you have to push your
boundaries. For some guys it may be something like being able to
sprint up a hill four times where you could barely walk it before.
For other guys it may mean learning to speak in public. But
whatever it is, it should be something that challenges you, even
scares you a bit. You may not be quite sure you can do it--but when
you take action anyways, and accomplish something you didn't know
you could do, your self esteem goes through the roof... and the
women
come running.
Remember, they don't flock around the loser at the end of the
event, nor do they flock around the guy who just showed up. They
run to meet the winner, because his self esteem pulls them to him.
It doesn't have to be anything great or grand, just something that
challenges you. And when you accomplish what you set out to do,
something magical happens--you want more. The feeling of
achievement is the ultimate addiction, and you won't be able to
stop yourself. The more you accomplish the more you want to
achieve, and the easier you discover it is to achieve.
By John Atlantis
Hey guys,
Awhile back I saw a very interesting episode of 60 Minutes
regarding the inflow of the "self esteem generation" into the
workplace. These were all the kids who got a prize for showing up,
not for winning (wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings by
elevating a winner), who'd been praised, spoiled, and coddled by
well intentioned parents and teachers and friends, and who were getting a very
rude awakening in the real world--something they were completely
unprepared for.
One of the guys they interviewed said transitioning these "love me
because I showed up kids" was a real problem, because they expected
rewards without achievement, something they were used to all of
their lives.
Do these kids have any real self esteem? No, they do not. Self
esteem doesn't come from "just showed up ribbons" or constant
praise and reassurance, it comes from achievement and
accomplishment. It comes from taking action and overcoming odds.
It comes from winning, and loathing of losing. The people with the
highest self esteem are those who hate losing to the point that
they take action to never lose. It
drives them to achievement, and sends their self esteem into the
stratosphere.
Here's the truth: if you're going to be successful with women, you
have to have self esteem. Women are magnetically attracted to men
with high self esteem--not the phony, "I just showed up so love me"
crap.
Here's a big secret: if your self esteem is not where you want it
to be, you can quickly and easily skyrocket it to where women can
feel your sense of yourself. And, quite frankly there are a lot of
guys who've taken some hits, had some losses, and their self esteem
is shaken--they start questioning themselves, and their esteem
plummets. I've had (brief) episodes of it myself, and if you're
alive and human, it will happen to you to.
But, when it happens, all you have to do is start the rebuilding
process. Now, I don't mean doing something goofy like wandering
around muttering "I esteem myself." That doesn't do anything
except make you look stupid.
To rebuild your self esteem, here's what to do: set a goal, no
matter how small, and accomplish it. Don't make it an easy one
(like breathing or getting out of bed), make it one where you have
to challenge yourself a bit, where you have to push your
boundaries. For some guys it may be something like being able to
sprint up a hill four times where you could barely walk it before.
For other guys it may mean learning to speak in public. But
whatever it is, it should be something that challenges you, even
scares you a bit. You may not be quite sure you can do it--but when
you take action anyways, and accomplish something you didn't know
you could do, your self esteem goes through the roof... and the
women
come running.
Remember, they don't flock around the loser at the end of the
event, nor do they flock around the guy who just showed up. They
run to meet the winner, because his self esteem pulls them to him.
It doesn't have to be anything great or grand, just something that
challenges you. And when you accomplish what you set out to do,
something magical happens--you want more. The feeling of
achievement is the ultimate addiction, and you won't be able to
stop yourself. The more you accomplish the more you want to
achieve, and the easier you discover it is to achieve.